Monday, December 24, 2018

Christmas is Here: What Ruins It for the Heroes?

A little Christmas-y content for your enjoyment!
Even heroes celebrate Christmas, but they rarely get to have the quiet parties they hope for--something or someoone dangerous always pops up to ruin it for them. Which is why their Christmas adventures feature themes like this:

Here's a table to randomly generate the threat that ruins the heroes' Christmas. You may not have time to run it this year (unless you actually know what the Twelve Days of Christmas are), but maybe next year. Or maybe for "Christmas in July"!

  1. An old foe they thought long gone returns for revenge.
  2. An old foe they tought long dead returns at the head of an army of zombies.
  3. An old foe begs for their help to stop an even worse evil.
  4. While dinner is cooking, the oven mysteriously malfunctions and fire elementals escape onto the Prime Material Plane.
  5. While dinner is cooking, the oven mysteriously malfunctions and reanimates the Christmas meal as a feiry, murderous beast-zombie.
  6. While dinner is cooking, the oven mysteriously malfunctions and causes everyone gathering for the Christmas dinner (and the entire house they're in) to be transported to Hell.
  7. Santa has been kidnapped by vengeful Martians, and it's up to the heroes to save him and Christmas!
  8. Santa's Daughter, Sugarplum, has been kidnapped by her crazed ex-boyfriend and Santa has come to the heroes for help.
  9. Cultists have summoned Narlahohohotep--the Caroler Out of Space--at Nakatomi Plaza.
 10. Santa's Reindeer have been stolen.
 11. A serial killer is on the loose!
 12. Roll two more times on the table, ignoring and rerolling duplicate results and additional results of 12. Both things converge to ruin the heroes' Christmas!

And while the heroes may feel like they're Two Steps from Hell, it's Christmas! So everything will hopefully turn out right in the end!

By Boris Vallejo

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