Sunday, March 2, 2014

Is it time for a third Bill Clinton-starring product?

Trashy tabloid- and  rightwing websites are a-twitter over former United States President Bill Clinton posing with for a picture with a pair of (assumed) prostitutes from Carson City's Moonlite Bunny Ranch brothel.

Barbie, Bill, and Ava
We thought we were all Clintoned out with ROLF!: Bill Clinton Meets a Girl Scout and ROLF!: Bill Clinton and the Secret City of Women, but maybe there's room for a trilogy here? Especially with Hillary Clinton getting ready for another run for the White House?

The various reporters are quick to note that Clinton may not have known he was posing with escorts who arrived with aging porn star Ron Jeremy, but, to borrow a phrase from Mrs. Clinton--WHAT DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE?!?

ROLF!: Bill and Ron's Excellent Adventure almost writes itself. The only thing we have to decide is whether Carlos Danger is Friend or Foe.

Saturday, March 1, 2014

The Power to Cloud Men's Minds....

While thinking about a number of superheroes who make little or no attempt to hide their faces when they have "secret identities,"--such as Superman or the Purple Tigress-- the following Superpower Talent Tree came to mind. (It is for use with the superpower system presented in Madden's Boys, but introduced in this post, on this very blog.)

CLOUD MINDS
You have the power to make others see you differently than who you actually are.
   Prerequisites: Wis 12, Cha 12, Minor Power feat
   Indescribable: By performing a minor, ritualistic change to your appearance—like taking off a pair of glasses (Superman) or wearing a particular costume (like Purple Tigress)--your appearance is slightly different to everyone who views you. Even photographic and film equipment produces images that appear subtely different to those who look at it. As a result, everyone describes the hero slightly differently when this power is in effect, not so different that the character isn't recognizable to those having conversations about him or her, but different enough that the dual identity is hard to penetrate. ^You can choose to reveal your dual identity to one or more people, after which they are never effected by this power again.
   Unquestionable: No matter how flimsy the explanation, you usually convince people who should know better that you are not the superhero that you've never been seen in the same room with. You must roll a successful Bluff skill check (DC8) to be successful.
   Unremarkable: When you choose, you can go unnoticed, no matter how outrageously dressed you may be, or how out of place you are. You must roll a successful Hide skill check (DC8) to be successful.
   Prerequisite: Indescribable
   Invisible: You have the power to become invisible to everything but sophisticated electronic recording equipment; you do not lose mass or body heat, so you are still visible to those who can can infrared or heat signatures, and pressure sensors will also record your presence.. You can move about and even talk (or laugh maniacally, or even do Orson Welles impersonations) without being seen. You can even used ranged attacks against targets without becoming visible. If you use a melee attack, your opponent sees you, and everyone else may make Spot checks (DC12) to see you. Otherwise, all those who attack you have a 50 percent chance to miss. (If the attack roll hits, the 50 percent miss chance is applied.)
   You must make a successful Concentration skill check (DC8) to successfully activate this power.
   Prerequisite: Unremarkable

The Purple Tigress has the Indescribable power, but cannot become Invisible.

Wednesday, February 26, 2014

There's a new Steven Seagal flick coming out!

As anyone visiting this blog (or any of the others I've maintained) knows, I have somewhat eclectic tastes. It should come as no surprise that I am awaiting Steven Seagal's latest DVD release with great expectation and curiosity.

What's more, it's set just north of where NUELOW Central is located--in Seattle!

A compiled version of two episodes from the True Justice television series, Dark Vengeance stars Seagal as Elijah Kane, who, with his team of detectives, is hunting down the Black Magic Killer. George Takei (of Star Trek and--well, being George Takei--fame) also makes an appearance.

I missed True Justice when it first aired during the 2011 and 2012 television seasons--being that I'm entering my 15th year of not having cable television at my home--so I'm looking forward to catching it now. I am even more fascinated by the fact that the serial killer in the film is, according to a promo blurb for the film, hunting victims in the "vagrant strip club underworld"... something which sounds like the title of a ROLF! supplement if you ask me.

And on that note, here is Steven Seagal ala ROLF!.(The Traits and Combat Maneuvers used, but not included in the core rules, can be found in ROLF!: Chinese Take Out.)

STEVEN SEAGAL (Male)
Brawn 33, Body 10, Brains 7
   Traits: Improv Master, Martial Artist, Stone Cold Killer
   Combat Maneuvers: Basic Attack, Disembowel, Dodge, Double Strike, Murderous Mitts, Signature Move, The Look.
   Important Stuff Worn/Wielded: Black Outfit (Clothes), Samurai Sword (Medium Melee Weapon, deals 4 points of damage that ignore armor). Pistol (Small Ranged Weapon, deals 3 points of damage that ignore armor).



Dark Vengeance arrives in a Redbox kiosk near you on Feb. 27 (that's tomorrow!). I probably won't get to it until the weekend, so if you beat me to the film, be sure let me know what you think. Meanwhile, you can click here to check out a fan art contest the promotion company behind the film is hosting!

You can also click here to read reviews of Steven Seagal films I've posted to Watching the Detectives.

Tuesday, February 25, 2014

Did we err in 'Modern Basics: Feats of an Adult Nature'?



In Modern Basics: Feats of an Adult Nature, we included the Gaydar feat. The prerequisite for taking it was the Gay feat.

But we got to thinking that there's something wrong with our model here, because you can't make a character who is a business owner in Arizona under those rules. If they don't possess the Gaydar feat, how are all those Arizona businesses owners that supposedly don't want to serve gay people going to tell them from everyone else?

Obviously, a fix is needed. So, here are a couple different ones.

(The Arizonan feat and Discerning Business Owner are presented under the Open Game License and it may be reproduced in compliant products and forums. Copyright Steve Miller 2014.)


NEW STARTING PROFESSION
Discerning Business Owner
You have the ability to leap to conclusions in a single bound, refusing service to anyone you happen not to like.
   Bonus Class Skills: Sense Motive and Spot become permanent class skills. If they are already class skills, you gain a +2 bonus to all checks using these skills.
   Bonus Feat: Gaydar (Discerning Business Owner replaces all prerequisites)

NEW FEAT
Arizonan [General]
You are of Arizona, body and soul.
   Benefit: +2 Fort saves to resist heat damage, +2 bonus to Charisma-based skill checks when wearing a ten-gallon or larger hat.
   Special: This feat qualifies the character for the Gaydar feat.

Gay? Or just from Arizona? Only the Gaydar knows!



Saturday, February 22, 2014

This may be a bit premature...

... but it appears that another End of the World has come and gone. And yet, we're all still here.

Epic ROLF! scenarios by Hundal & Miller

 According to the claims of some "Norse mythology experts," today (Feb 22, 2014) is the day the Vikings predicted the World Would End... Ragnarok wold bring low the gods, the earth, reality itself.

And it's safe to say they were wrong. Loki's pet wolf hasn't eaten the sun. Earthquakes haven't spat Jotuns from the earth (or whatever). While there are still a few hours left to go here in 2/22/2014 here at NUELOW Central, it's been 2/23/2014 for about two hours at our branch office in Wadyia, and they seem to be fine.

Boy, do we regret taking the week off here at NUELOW Games and spending it in recreating Viking feasts. We're going to have an epic hangover tomorrow, and we're going to have to catch up on lots of work.

However, in celebration of yet another End of the World that has come and gone, we are offering ROLF!: Apocalypse Not free of charge through this week's Day of Odin. (That's Wednesday for all you non-Viking types.)

ROLF! Apocalypse Not was part of our Final Battles series, which was created to countdown to to the predicted End of the World i 2012. They're all available in one big bundle that can be yours by clicking here!

A full year's of ROLF! madness from Hundal & Miller!



Friday, February 14, 2014

Happy Valentine's Day!

We hope everyone of our NUELOW Games friends has someone to exchange sweet nothings with this Valentine's Day.

To show our affection for you, everything in our catalog is at least 14% off... and our brand-new Ginger and Snap book, as well as the core rules for ROLF!: The Rollplaying Game of Big Dumb Fighters, are discounted even steeper than that! Click here to see all our offerings.

The sale continues through 2/20/2014... we hope you'll find a book or a game you can love as much as your sweetheart. Or maybe a book you can love in place of a sweetheart.

We hope your heart gets treated better than what
NUELOW mascot June Collyer is doing here.


Monday, February 10, 2014

Introducing Ginger and Snap (via ROLF!)

This week, NUELOW Games will release Ginger and Snap, the first ever collection of a humor series featuring a pair of gender-role swapping twins. You can read more about the book and its background here, at Steve Miller's Shades of Gray blog.

Meanwhile, here at NUELOW games, we're offering you the all-new ROLF! trait, as well as ROLF stats for Ginger and Snap by L.L. Hundal.


NEW TRAIT FOR ROLF!
   Twin: You make two characters for the "price of one," each of them with the Twin attribute. Each character possesses this Trait and starts with one less Combat Maneuver and/or Spelling than their Brains ATT indicates. Each character also has the same scores in ATT, but one Twin must have his or her ATT scores lowered by 2 points. The points can be deducted from one ATT or divided. Each Twin’s Combat Maneuvers can as similar or different as the player chooses to make them.
   Depending on the Battle Scenario, the player of the Twins can start with both characters in play, or he can swap one out through the use of Run Away or some similar Maneuver that removes a character from a fight. The other Twin joins in the fight the following round at the appropriate point dictated by the ABBA sequence. This can be done as often as the player likes, but if the side of the player controlling the Twins ever is left with no active character in a fight, the other side wins.
   If a Battle Scenario specifies that characters start the Scenario with their ATT restored to starting levels, a Twin re-entering the fight does so with any lost ATT points intact.
   If a Twin is ever reduced to Zero Brawn, the other Twin immediately loses half his or her Brawn permanently.


PRE-GENERATED CHARACTERS FOR ROLF!
GINGER (Female)
Brawn 14, Body 12, Brains 7
   Traits: Improv Master, Twin (of Snap)
   Combat Maneuvers: Basic Attack, Disarm, Dodge, Run Away, Strike Pose, Withering Insult
   Important Stuff Worn/Wielded: School Books (Melee Weapon, deals 1 point of damage OR One Shot Ranged Weapon, deals 1 point of damage).

SNAP (Male)
Brawn 13, Body 12, Brains 6
   Traits: Improv Master, Twin (of Ginger)
   Combat Maneuvers: Basic Attack, Dodge, Double Strike, Run Away, Strike Pose
   Important Stuff Worn/Wielded: School Books (Melee Weapon, deals 1 point of damage OR One Shot Ranged Weapon, deals 1 point of damage).

Ginger (right) and her twin brother Snap