When life imitates ROLF!: Hollie-May Saker vs. the Feminazis!

We should have written this battle scenario. But real life beat us to it.

A pair of Rush Limbaugh's Feminazis tore off their shirts and stormed the catwalk at the Paris Fashion Week. They harassed and "manhandled" one of the models. The model, Brit Hollie-May Saker, punched one of them in the nose and continued modeling the flapper-style dress she was wearing.

You can read all about it in "That Bitch Ruined My Walk" by clicking here.

And, inspired by actual events, here are a couple of battle scenarios and ROLF! stats for Hollie-May Saker (and I really hope that last name is pronounced "sack-her" and not "say-ker"), FEMEN Feminazi protesters, and Rush Linbaugh. Yes... Rush Limbaugh has nothing to do with Paris Fashion Week or Hollie-May Saker, but we once Hollie-May is done kicking the crap out of the Feminazis, the Feminazis can vent their frustrations on Limbaugh.


PRE-GENERATED CHARACTERS

HOLLIE-MAY SAKER (Female)
Brawn 15, Body 17, Brains 5
   Traits: Improv Master, Nimble, Short-tempered, Too Sexy for My Shirt,
   Combat Maneuvers: Basic Attack, Murderous Mitts, Strike Pose, The Look, The Walk
Important Stuff Work/Wielded: High Fashion (Clothes), Smartphone (One-shot Ranged Weapon. Deals 1 point of damage).


FEMEN PROTESTER/FEMINAZI (Female)
Brawn 12, Body 14, Brains 3
Traits: Dour, Too Sexy for My Shirt
   Combat Maneuvers: Basic Attack, Bitch Slap, Castrate
   Important Stuff Worn/Wielded: Penis-shaped Club (Melee Weapon. Deals 2 points of damage).


RUSH LIMBAUGH (Male)
Brawn 11, Body 12, Brains 6
   Traits: Jolly, Too Sexy for My Shirt
   Combat Maneuvers: Basic Attack, Debate Philosophy, Disarm, Dodge, Knock Out, Run Away
   Important Stuff Worn/Wielded: Expensive Suit (Clothes), Cigarcase (One-shot Ranged Weapon. Deals 1 point of damage). The Golden EIB Microphone (Melee Weapon. Deals 2 points of damge.

For more fashion-world mayhem and violence, check out ROLF!: Supermodel Slapfest. The Combat Maneuvers featured in the previous character designs not in the main rules can be found in that supplement.

And just because, here are some random pictures of Holly-May Saket...

I'ts National Buy a Book Day! (Sept. 7)

Time to get out to your local bookstore and buy a book. Do it. Now. Then read it!

If you can't get out, we recommend you buy one of the fiction anthologies NUELOW Games has produced. They're cheap, and they exist to show you sides of writers you thought you knew but really don't. Click here for previews and to buy dowloadable PDFs that work great on your computers or iPads.

Getting a graphic novel or two also counts as supporting National Buy a Book Day. We have those at NUELOW Games as well, if you can't get out of the out of the house. Film Fun Comics Vol. 2: The Black Cat vs. HIM! and Film Fun Comics Vol. 3: British Agent 99 contain both fiction AND comics! Click here to see our selection of comics, also in PDF format and perfect for your iPad. (As an added bonus, every one of our comic book products also features RPG content!)

Support the writers, artists, publishers, and retailers among us. Keep your brain fed, and help feed those who grow and distribute that brain food!

Coming this later this week...

We're releasing another collection of drawings from the NUELOW Games stock art files. Adapted from Golden Age comic book covers (and other sources), this horror themed collection is being released just in time to help you with your October RPG games or online publications, as the 30+ color and black-and-white drawings are being offered under a liberal license that lets you do pretty much anything you want with them.

Look for NUELOW Games Stock Art Collection #3: Beauties and the Beasts at all the usual outlets day after tomorrow. (Meanwhile, check out Stock Art Collection #2: Dames, Danger & Death.)

The Return of Sally the Sleuth!

When Sally the Sleuth goes undercover at the culinary college operated by Chef Gordon Blue, the question isn't whether she'll solve the mystery but whether she'll manage to keep her clothes on while doing so. We hope you'll check out ROLF!: A Recipe for Evil, the latest comics/RPG hybrid project from NUELOW Games. It marks Sally's second appearance in ROLF!, and our 12th release to feature actual comics along-side the game content..

Last year, we published what we thought would be perhaps the first of two NUELOW Games products to contain actual comics--ROLF!: Turkey Shoot. It was a revival of the first woman detective in American comics and possibly even the genre's first "Good Girl," Sally the Sleuth, together with half a dozen of her earliest adventures.

That "Thanksgiving Special," however, led to way for a whole new product product category for us... the game/comic book hybrid, a concept Steve Miller has felt strongly about for many years. While we still haven't done anything with what was conceived as our second comics project (aside from a blog post written by L.L. Hundal), there have been a dozen other releases, which you can check out here. With the original Black Cat as a sort-of anchor character, we've dusted off characters that haven't been heard from since the 1940s and given them new life while presenting and remaining true to their original adventures. In some cases, we've even published, for the first time, the complete run of certain characters within a single book, like we did with the Veiled Avenger in Lady Satan and British Agent 99 in Film Fun Comics, Vol. 3.

We have many more comics/RPG hybrid comics planned. We hope you will consider checking out not only ROLF!: A Recipe for Evil, but also some of our other offerings. The Science Sleuths series is proving to be quite popular, for example, and the first few issues are devoted entirely to crime-fighting females like Sally. (With issue #3, we're adding a crime-fighting couple to the mix, as the Rocketman series joins the line-up.)

For the full listing of all our comics releases, click on the "World's Greatest Comics" badge to right. (That's right... we only publish the World's Greatest Comics here at NUELOW Games.)

More "Science Sleuths" from NUELOW Games!

Brains, beauty, and a healthy helping of brawn... they're shooting from the hip and making weird science!

Science Sleuths #2 is now available for purchase at all the usual outlets! Click here to see previews or to get your very own copy. It features three action-packed stories starring Jill Trent and Daisy Smythe, as well as another Spider Queen tale. As always, there are some RPG tidbits as well--this time, it's d20 Modern OGL stats for Jill, Daisy, the Spider Queen, and the original Black Cat, the leading lady of our comics line. There are also a couple of other amusing filler items, because Steve Miller is obsessed with trying to make sure stories and chapters start on right-hand pages.

A special attraction in this issue is "Jill Trent: The Freezer Gas," which features early artwork from the legendary Frank Frazetta.

It's Lovecraft's birthday, and YOU get the gift!

Today, August 20, 2013, is the 123th anniversary of the birth of H.P. Lovecraft. We're celebrating by giving YOU the gift.

For today only, you can download ROLF!: Herbert West vs. the Zombies for free. The battle scenario was inspired by a string of stories that were among Lovecraft's least favorite of his works, but which rank among the ones we like the best here at NUELOW Games.

Click here to get your copy now! Don't panic, and keep your Elder Sign handy.

Howard Phillips Lovecraft: 8/20/1890 - 3/15/1937

Given what's going on in Egypt....

... and the absolute disaster that is the Obama Administration's Mid-East policy, would it be bad form to mention that John Kerry vs. the Queen of Evil features Kerry as a 3,000 year-old priest of Iss revived in modern times to fight his undying nemesis? Yeah... probably, especially since it features ROLF! stats for Kerry, the Queen of Evil, the goddess Isis, and ancient citizens of Luxor. And then there's the back-up feature starring Black Cat where she takes on "Cleopatra of the Casbah." Yes. Almost certainly bad form, not to mention possibly disrespectful of the rioters burning Christian churches and attacking government buildings. So, I better not mention that book at all, even though it can be downloaded right now for the special "pay what you want" price.

It would be even tackier of me to bring up ROLF!: Super Muslim Bros., which pokes fun at the architects of the bloody mess that is Egypt today, as Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton go on a secret mission to help Mohamed Morsi out of a bind. Yeah... that would be even worse, since that one features ROLF! stats for Morsi, Obama, Clinton, Muslim Brotherhood Thugs, mummies, and other bloodthirsty Egyptian "protesters." And I should certainly not mention that you can find it for sale at RPGNow.

Yeah... that would be horribly insensitive to the "death to America" crowd, which is pretty much everyone in Egypt these days....

I think I'll just focus on promoting our new comics/gaming project -- the happy four-color wonder that is Carnival! After all, it's got game material geared for OGL Modern, a far more popular game that ROLF!, so it just makes sense. (It even features a Black Cat story that is non-Egypt related... and plenty of clowns that have nothing to do with formulating U.S. foreign policy.)