Why does Donald Trump want a Space Force?

Donald Trump is the presidential gift that keeps on giving as far as we here at NUELOW Games is concerned: We've gotten more mileage out of him than we've gotten out of Bill Clinton and Barak Obama combined, and his presidency isn't anywhere near to being over yet!

This time up, we have a random table for you. Admittedly, we're not sure how useful it is, but maybe it can serve as an inspiration for ROLF! battle scenarios that pit Donald Trump against the Commies and/or Girl Scouts from Jupiter.

WHY IS DONALD TRUMP PUSHING FOR A SPACE FORCE? (Roll 1d12)
   1. He's too ill-formed to know that the United States Air Force Space Command already exists.
   2. The alien symbiote that passes for his hair wants to go home, but there are hostile forces between here and there.
   3. The alien symbiote that passes for his hair wants to go to war against the Martians
   4. The alien symbiote that passes for his hair wants to prepare the world for an attack by the Girl Scouts from Jupiter.
   5. He wants his face carved on the moon.
   6. He wants his buttcheeks carved on the moon.
   7. He wants to be a real Space Cadet.
   8. The Decepticons must be stopped!
   9. He knows the truth about the aliens and the Visitors are not our friends!
   10. Flash Gordon has retired and he wants to be the new Savior of the Universe.
   11. He wants to build a moon base to impress his pals Putin, Kim, and Ming the Merciless.
   12. Roll two more times on the table, ignoring other rolls of 12 and repeated numbers. Both results are true.

Who Killed the Father of the Bride?

Here's another randomly generated murder mystery adventure plot!

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It was a gorgeous summer day and it was the perfect backdrop for a wedding, but then the father of the bride turned up dead. Who killed Major Payne?

HOW WAS HE KILLED? (Roll 1d12)
1. Drowned.
2. Poisoned.
3. Stabbed with an antique sword.
4. Garotted.
5. Strangled.
6. Suffocated with pillow.
7. Run over by a car/delivery van.
8. Thrown from a roof top.
9. Electrocuted in his bath.
10. Bludgeoned with a candlestick taken from among the wedding gifts.
11. Stabbed through the eye with a chopstick.
12. Roll twice on the table; he died from a combination of the two.


WHERE WAS HE KILLED? (Roll 1d12)
(If the location doesn't match the method of murder, the body was discovered at the location indicated, and you can pick a logical actual
1. His hotel room.
2. The hotel terrace.
3. The hotel parking garage.
4. In the bridal suite.
5. In a hotel elevator.
6. In the hedge maze behind the hotel.
7. In the hotel pool/spa/gym.
8. In the coat check room.
9. In the bride's home.
10. In the groom's home.
11. In his home.
12. Roll twice on the table. He was killed at the first location, but the body was found at the second.

WHY WAS HE KILLED? (Roll 1d12)
1. Revenge.
2. To protect a government coverup.
3. Jealousy.
4. To protect a spy ring.
5. For the inheritance.
6. To protect the bride's dark secret.
7. To protect the groom's dark secret.
8. To protect a Satanic cult.
9. To keep him from stopping the wedding.
10. To keep him from revealing who are shapeshifting aliens at the top level of government.
11. Hatred.
12. Roll twice on the table. He was killed for both reasons.


WHO DID IT? (Roll 1d12)
1. The bride.
2. The groom.
3. The father of the bride.
4. The mother of the bride.
5. The best man.
6. The maid of honor.
7. The priest.
8. The wedding photographer.
9. The major's gay lover.
10. The bride's lesbian lover.
11. The hotel's owner.
12. Roll twice on the table. The first result is the murderer, and the second result is who he or she is framing for the murder.

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Suddenly... Jazz Hands!

Here's a new feat for your  all d20 System games! (The following text is presented under the Open Game License and may be reproduced in accordance with it. Copyright 2018 Steve Miller.)

JAZZ HANDS! [General]

When your foe least expects it... jazz hands!

   Prerequisite: Perform (dance) 1 rank, Charisma 12

   Benefit: On a round where you are first in the initiative order, as full round action, your character can strike a pose, hold out his or her hands with the palms facing front and fingers splayed, and start to shake them while saying something like "razzamataaz" or "yeeeaaah".

   Foes who are in the character's forward arc, and who witness the display, must roll a successful Will save (DC18+the character's Charisma bonus), or be so startled that they lose all actions for that round. If affected foes who are not attacked during the round, they suffer an initiative penalty equal to the character's Charisma bonus on the following round.
   Special: Jazz Hands can only be used every other round.

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Gun Blessing Day! (An OGL Modern Game Aid)

There's a local pastor (or witch doctor or sorcerer, or druid--whatever fits the setting) who is offering to bless the party's firearms. Roll 1d12 against the chart below to see what benefit is gained, aside from each one blessed becoming an enchanted weapon.

1. +1 bonus to hit.

2. +1 bonus to damage.

3. +1 bonus to hit and damage.

4. Maximum damage against vampires.

5. Maximum damage against werewolves.

6. Maximum damage against dragons.

7. Maximum damage against mummies.

8. Damage dealt is converted to fire damage.

9. Person carrying or wielding the firemarm has a +2 bonus to Hide and Move Silently skill checks.

10. Person weilding the firearm has a -6 penalty to hit unarmed or non-threatening targets.

11. Person wielding the firearm bursts into flames (1d12+2 points of damage per round for 3 rounds) if it used against unarmed or non-threatening targets.

12. +4 to hit and damage against hostile creatures.

OPTIONAL COMPLICATION (Contributed by Craig Dixon)

There is one little problem with these blessed weapons...
   If a person one is reduced to zero or fewer hit points while carrying or firing one of these blessed weapons, they must make an immediate Fort save (DC12) [save versus death in OSR versions of D&D].
   If the saving throw succeeds, proceed with the normal stabalization rules to see if the character lives or dies.
   If the saving throw fails, the character's soul is prevented from moving onto the afterlife. Instead, it is torn from te body and drawn to where the weapon was blessed, together with the magic placed on it, to feed the sponsoring deity. The character's soul is lost forever within 13 hours.

   The weapon reverts to normal at this time and must be returned to the temple to be re-blessed.

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The text in this post is released under the Open Game License and may be reproduced in accordance with it. Copyright Steve Miller 2018.

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A Valentine's Day feat!

A little something in the spirit of Valentine's Day for your d20 System games!

TRUE LOVE [General]
The character has found the love of his or her life. This gives the character something to live for, even when things seem at their most dire and hopeless.
   Benefit: When the character is reduced to less than 10 hit points, a fond memory about his or her beloved flashes into his or her mind. As a free action, you may roll a Will save (DC12). If successful, the character immediately regain 1d10+2 hit points.
   This feat can be used once per game session. You must choose to invoke the feat or not as soon as the character is reduced to less than 10 hit points, and if you choose not to, you may do so again during the following combat round if the character suffers additional damage.
   If a character with this feat is reduced to less than 0 hit points, you may immediately invoke this feat in order to attempt to regain hit points. If the character is returned to above 0 hit points, he or she does not fall unconscious or have to worry about making stabilization rolls.
   Special: If you write a description and a history for your character's true love (who the true love is, how the characters met, and so on), and the GM approves it, your character gains a permanent +1 bonus to Will saves to resist fear and mind-affecting magic and spell-like effects. This bonus increases to +2 if you generate stats for the true love and give the character to the GM for possible use in the game. (The true love must be at least two character levels lower than the lowest-level PC in the campaign, or 1st level.)

Photo by Gavin Hoey

Two Feats of Questionable Quality (but we like 'em!)

We hope these get your February off to a fun start.

BABY ROLL [Combat]
You may use babies as distractions in combat.
   Benefit: When fighting, you may roll or throw a baby per round at opponents with a standard attack action. Any lawful good character must give up a combat action in order to either dodge or attempt to catch the baby by making a Reflex save (DC equals your attack roll). If the target fails to avoid or catch the baby, he or she and the baby both take 1d2 points of damage. If your attack roll misses, the baby still takes 1d2 points of damage.
   Special: If you have the Two-Weapon Fighting feat, you may roll or throw two babies each round.

BAD IDEA [General, Metagame]
You knew it was a bad idea, but you did it anyway.
   Prerequisite: One talent from the Too Dumb to Die tree.
   Benefit: Whenever you fail an attack roll or skill check that had a DC of 22 or higher, the GM must let you roll 2d6 and add the result to your check total. If the new total means a successful check, that's exactly what it is. If it fails, you deserve what you get for being overconfident and stupid.

(This material is released under the Open Game License and may be reproduced in accordance with it. Copyright 2018 Steve Miller.)

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Random Adventure Seeds: Are the Kids All Right?

The kids somehow seem off. Why? Are they just kids being kids (and therefore weird) or is there something more sinister going on? That's the question that this latest random adventure seed generator asks--and there may be a problem with the kids that only the player characters in your campaign can solve!

Are the Kids All Right? (Roll 1d8)
   1. Yes. They're fine. They're 1) toddlers; 2-3) tweens; 4-5) teens; 6) college-aged and they should have found jobs and moved the hell out of the house; but they're fine. They'll grow out of it (and into who-knows-what!)
   2. No. They're dabbling in the occult and are planning to sacrifice their parents in dark rituals.
   3. No. They've been replaced with alien replicants.
   4. No. They played in that abandoned house down the street and have been possessed by evil spirits.
   5. No. They've been kidnapped by the Russian Hackers and only the player characters (or perhaps Liam Neeson) can save them.
   6. No. They have become vessels for the 1-2) Norse; 3-4) Babylonian; 5-6) Chinese; 7-8) Greek; gods and are trying to bring about the end of the universe!
   7.  No.. They are experimenting with 1-2) newly found mutant powers; 3-4) a time displacement device they sent to themselves from the future 5-6) a board game that makes them play it out in real life 4) eating Tide pods,
   8. No. They committed a crime and 1-2) they didn't do and now the party must prove their innosence and how it ws committed and who it. 3-4) they were framed by the CIA to recruit the parents. 5-6) were sent to Guantanamo Bay 7-8) are calling for bail money.

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(By Steve Miller, with contributions from Dave Mendez. If you had fun with this, check out one of the NUELOW Games releases that Dave has also contributed to!)