Friday, April 20, 2018

Who Killed the Pothead?

Everywhere he went, the unmistakable smell of ganja wafted through the air. Everyone he met was greeted with a friendly (if extremely mellow), "Hey, dude!". No one could imagine life-long pothead Laurel Yannay having an enemy in the world... and yet, someone has murdered him!

Use the tables below to generate an outline for a murder mystery for the player characters in your RPG campaign to solve! (Click here to see all the Random Murder Mysteries I've posted!)

WHERE WAS HE FOUND? (Roll 1d12)
1. On his couch.
2. On the beach.
3. In the park.
4. In the church parking lot.
5. Behind the smoke shop.
6. In the marijuana field.
7. In the congresswoman's office.
8. In  his pot-plot, in his parents' backyard shed.
9. In his mom's basement.
10. On the steps of city hall.
11. In the alley by the mosque.
12. Roll twice on this table. He was killed at the first location, but his body was left at the second. If the same result comes up twice, he was killed where he was found. Ignore additional results of 8.

HOW WAS HE KILLED? (Roll 1d12)
1. Crushed to death.
2. Strangled.
3. Poisoned.
4. Suffocated with hundreds of jelly beans.
5. Stabbed 1d12.
6. Shot 1d6 times.
7. Beaten to death.
8. Skull crushed with a blunt object.
9. Broken neck.
10. Electrocuted.
11. Thoat slit.
12. Roll two more times on this table; he died from both methods. If the same result comes up twice, he was killed by a single method, but MAN was the killer thorough. Ignore additional results of 8.


WHO KILLED HIM? (Roll 1d12)
1. His dealer.
2. His mother.
3. His lover. (Roll 1d8. 1-6 female, 7-12 male.)
4. His ex-lover. (Roll 1d12. 1-6. female, 7-12 male.)
5. The stripper. (Roll 1d12. 1-6 female, 7-12 male.)
6. The professional assassin.
7. The anti-legalization activist.
8. The pro-legalization activist.
9. The congress woman.
10.The congress woman's husband.
11. The DEA agent.
12. Roll two more times on this table. The first result is the killer. The second result is a person who helped over up the murder. Roll on the DARK SECRET table to determine the motivation as to why they worked together to kill the pothead. Ignore and reroll additional results of 8.

WHY WAS HE KILLED? (Roll 1d12)
1. Hatred.
2. Jealousy.
3. Greed.
4. Revenge
5. Dispute over who had eaten all the Doritos chips.
6. Crazed fanaticism. (Roll 1d12. 1-6 pro-pot legalization, 7-12 anti-pot legalization.)
7. Because his parents were sick of him living in their basement and growing pot in their tool shed.
8. As a sacrifice to a demon-possessed bong.
9. It was a mistake. The killer thought he was someone else. That person will be murdered in 1d4 days if the heroes don't solve the case. (Roll on the WHO KILLED HIM table to determine who the next victim will be. Ignore and re-roll if you roll the killer again.)
10. One of the player characters is the true victim. Killing the pothead was just a way for the killer to draw that person to a killing ground of his or her choosing.
11. The killer is a maniac who believes the pothead was possessed by an evil spirit. He now believes the spirit is in one of the other people on the WHO KILLED HIM table. He will kill another victim every three days until the party stops him. Roll on the "Who Killed Him" table after each death to determine the new victim. If a victim, or the killer, ever repeats, the next target is one of the player characters.
12. To stop him from revealing the dark secret. (Roll on the WHAT IS THE DARK SECRET table?)

WHAT IS THE DARK SECRET? (Roll 1d12)
1. The pothead and the killer were having a secret love affair that he was going to reveal publicly.
2. The pothead was going to reveal that the killer is a Russian spy.
3. He had discovered a local dealer/store owner was lacing the pot with a highly addictive substance of mysterious origin.
4. He discovered a cult devoted to infusing bongs with evil spirits that would then possess users.
5. He was the illegitimate child of the killer, and he was going to reveal that fact to the world.
6. He was going to publicize the membership list of the secret society, Potheads for Trump.
7. He discovered the truth about the Eleven Herbs and Spices.
8. He had proof that Donald Trump's hair is an alien symbiote.
9. He had discovered a mixture of pot and 'shrooms that provided a non-addictive super high, and the killer wanted the rcipie to profit on by himself.
10. As 9, except the mixture of pot and 'shrooms is one that's been known to the Society of the Green Hand for thousands of years, and it allows for spirit travel to their secret meeting place. He had to silenced.
11. He was a police informant and the murderer thought he had dirt on him. (1-6 he did, 7-12 he did not.)
12. Roll two more times on this table. Both secrets apply. If you roll the same secret twice, roll again on the WHO KILLED HIM table. The indicated character also knew the secret and will be murdered in two days if the killer isn't unmasked. 


And here's a song to help you get in the mood for the adventure...


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